Devil Dick

What is Devil Dick you ask?

~Exceptionally good dick that happens to be attached to a Fuckboy, who knows he is a Fuckboy, with exceptionally good dick. ~

Oh dear God,

You can stop sending me Fuck boys now. 

I learned my lesson. 

Amen.

Thank you. 

You are a good man. 

Thank you SO much for wasting no time.

Honesty saves everyones time. 

If you weren't straight up, you would have wasted your time trying. 

If I stuck around for a little, your intentions would eventually be known and you still wouldn't get what you wanted. 

Worked out for the both of us in the end right? 

His ego may have been bruised a bit.

Seeing as 15 minutes pass by and he unmatched me just. like. that. 

It was WONDERFUL.

I felt like James bond. 

You can call that bullet, Dodged. 

Honestly, at this point I feel like I didn't just dodge a bullet. 

I dodged a freakin' freight train.

Can a girl get a Hey? Hi? Where you from? 

Pleasing girls is not expensive. 

It only costs $0.00 to not be a Fuckboy. 

What is a Fuckboy you ask?

Well, for decades us ladies have been really studying the art of the "Fuckboy" act.

Fuckboy

~A manipulative dick (no pun intended) who does what it takes to benefit him, regardless of who he screws over. They will screw over anyone and everyone just to get what they want. Generally, a fuckboy is a person (or animal) who pisses off the majority of the women population. Typical Fuckboys like to pursue multiple women at a time and also run their mouth in the streets once they smash. 

How to differentiate between a Fuckboy and a man?

Honey, if his favorite line is "I didn't tell you because I knew you would get mad". He's probably a Fuckboy. 

- "I just want a level headed woman, who isn't crazy." 

- Says Fuckboys who turn level headed women crazy. 

Women, there are so many wonderful men out there.

Men, there are so many wonderful women out there.

Lets start being honest like this guy.

Well, maybe not so harsh and forward at first. 

Maybe I wouldn't have offered to show his face to the nearest wall.  

Boys, there are so many girls who wanna bang you, just find the ones who don't want a relationship in return.

I assure you, there are plenty. 

It's freakin 2017. 

Girl...

You don't need a fuckboy. 

I don't need a fuckboy. 

We have to stop watering dead plants. 

I didn't wake up to any good morning texts, but I did wake up to a direct deposit.

The only tears you see me crying are the ones laughing all the way to the bank.

Go there and show him what a fucking awesome girl he lost or missed out on. 

Keep that Fuckboy shit 👉👉 over there.

UNLESS GIRL....

Unless you like free hoodies. 

So many girls who fall for the Fuckboy act forget there is one positive side.

What is that you ask?

The inspiration he gives you. 

If you're a girl, and you've got so many hoodies at your house that you collect from Fuckboys, you're all set. Start your own fashion label called "Fuckboy Fleece". 

Unless he's got a 12 inch, magical dick that holds the Krabby Patty secret ingredient, he is replaceable. 

Stop putting up with his shit. 

Men....

This is John. 

John doesn't talk to other girls when he's in a relationship. 

John isn't a Fuckboy. 

Be like John. 

Or if you wanna bang be like Thomas.

Yeah, I was too lazy to blur it all out sorry Thomas. 

You're a good man. 

The Chair With Chels💋

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